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Ibimenyetso 10 Bizakwereka ko Umusore Mukundana Akwiyumvamo cyangwa se ko Agukunda by¬?Ukuri

Posted on August 8, 2011 at 5:40 AM

1. Yita ku rukundo mufitanye kandi akaruha agaciro

 

Aha ngo uzasanga akunda kukubaza uko ubona urukundo mufitanye rumeze, uko urwiyumvamo ibitagenda ndetse n’uko byakosorwa. Uzasanga ntetse akunda no kukubaza  amakuru y’inshuti zawe, ay’umuryango wawe ndetse n’uko bimeze ku kazi kawe mu gihe ugafite ,uko amasomo agenda niba wiga ndetse nubwo atabikubwira cyangwa se ngo akubaze byinshi ariko ugasanga  ahora ashaka kumenya byinshi  kuri wowe. Ibyo ukunda, inshuti zawe ndetse  no kumenya birambuye ibijyanye n’umuryango wawe kandi usange ahora akubaza icyakorwa kugira ngo urukundo rwanyu rutere imbere.

2. Uzasanga asobanukiwe kandi azi neza  ibigushimisha

Ngo niba umusore agukunda by’ukuri uzasanga azi neza ikintu ashobora kugukorera ku buryo wishima, ugaseka ukiyumva nk’umuntu udasanzwe mu  bandi bakobwa bose  baziranye na we. Uzasanga akubwira ibyo amatwi yawe akeneye kumva ndetse no mu gihe ubabaye akube hafi  ntakujye kure , usange araguhamagara buri kanya ashaka kumenya uko umerewe kandi akubwire amagambo  wumva ko asubiza umutima impembero, mbese agusubiza mu bihe by’umunezero. Uzabona ko azi imyenda yambara ukayishimira bityo naza kubonana nawe abe ari yo yambara, azi ubwoko bw’ikinyobwa n’ubw’ibiryo ukunda, aho ukunda gusohokera, ibyo ukunda gukora, usange ahora ashakisha uburyo ibigushimisha ari byo wibonamo kugira ngo uhore unezerewe.

3. Uzabona ari umuntu ukunda gutekereza no gukora hirya no hino kugira ngo agushimishe

Buri gihe uzasanga akunda guhora  ashakakisha , atekereza ku bintu  bitandukanye ashobora gukora kugira ngo ubuzima bwawe bwa buri munsi bukuryohere ndetse niba unezerewe, na we bimugireho ingaruka cyangwa se niba ubabaye ubone na we byamukozeho abure amahoro ubone ko ahangayikishijwe n’ibihe bitari byiza urimo ndetse anabibwire inshuti ze aho ushobora kubona bagenzi be haguhamagara bakubaza uko umerewe, akuzanire akantu utatekerezaga ndetse akakubaza n’uko ubyakiriye.

4. Aguhamagara ntacyo agamije cyangwa se nta kintu agendereye

Aha ngo uzasanga hari ubwo aguhamagaye wumve abuze icyo akubwira mbega nta kintu gifatika aguhamagariye, uretse kukubwira ko agukunda kandi ko agukumbuye. Ngo naguhamagara ntakubaze icyo uri gukora, uwo muri kumwe ibi rero ngo ahanini abiterwa n’uko iyo mutari kumwe aba agutekereza akumva ko hari ikibura muri we ko atuzuye kugira ngo yumve aguwe neza akaguhamagara wenda kugira ngo yumve ijwi ryawe. Ibi rero ngo nta kindi kiba kibimutera ni ukukwiyumvamo n’urukundo rw’ukuri aba agukunda kandi akumva ko ukenewe kugira ngo ubuzima bwe bube bwuzuye.

 5. Yifuza kumarana igihe kinini nawe/ igihe muri kumwe ntaba yifuza ko mwatandukana

Aha ngo uzasanga niba koko akwiyumvamo, igihe  cye cyose afite atari gukora yifuza ko mwaba muri kumwe, mbega igihe cyose akumva ko yakwihoranira nawe, akumva kandi yakubona hafi ye. Aha ngo igihe muri kumwe uzabona ko ashaka ko museka, muganira ku buzima bwanyu buri imbere, muvuga ku byabateza imbere aho kugira ngo yikunde cyangwa se akuzaneho iby’irari rye gusa. Usanga apanga gahunda ye neza ku buryo akubonera umwanya uhagije mukavugana.

6. Iyo urimo kumubwira ikintu aba aguhanze amaso/akwitayeho

Iki ngo ni kimwe mu bimenyetso byerekana ko agufitiye urukundo kandi ko wamukuruye. Iyo  akureba mu maso biba bisobanura ko nta kindi ari gutekereza ahubwo ko agukurikiye ashimishijwe cyane no kumva ikintu kiguturukamo bikavuga ko imitima yanyu iri kumwe.

7. Yifuza kukumenya birambuye

Niba koko akwiyumvamo kandi akagufata nk’umuntu udasanzwe uzasanga akunda kukubaza icyo warose nijoro, ibyo wifuza kugeraho mu buzima, ibyo uteganya, uko wabayeho mutaramenyana, akifuza ko umusangiza ubuzima wabayeho, ibyakubabaje, ibyo ukeneye kugira ngo ubuzima bugende neza ndetse nubwo waba ubona ko ntacyo yabikoraho bitewe n’ubushobozi  bwe, ibyo ukunda, ibyo wanga n’ibigushimisha. Iki ngo ni ikimenyetso gikomeye cyerekana ko umusore agukunda kandi ko akwiyumvamo.

8. Iyo muri kumwe aba ashaka kuguhobera cyane ndetse no kugukorakora

Aha ngo iyo yishimira kugukorakora no kuguhobera akagukomeza ubona ko ntabuhehesi burimo cyangwa se atagamije gutuma utwarwa kugira ngo abe yagukoresha imibonano mpuzabitsina ahubwo ko ari ibizongamubiri bimurimo, ngo rwose aba agukunda  akifuza ko nawe wakumva urukundo rumurimo mugasangira ibyishimo. Kandi ngo n’igihe muri kumwe mu nzira mugendana agakunda kugufata ukuboko cyangwa se mu kiganza igihe agiye kukubwira ikintu akakureba mu maso.

9. Mu gihe wagize ibyago agaragaza uruhare rwe kandi akakuba hafi

Niba wabuze umuvandimwe, umubyeyi cyangwa se n’ikindi kintu cyari kigufitiye akamaro, ngo ukabona umusore w’incuti yawe ashaka kuba nyambere mu kukwegera no kukuba hafi, cyangwa se niba wabuze nk’umwe mu muryango ugasanga ahageze mbere, agufashije kubimenyesha abandi, akohereje ubutumwa bwo kukwihanganisha, azanye n’inshuti ze kwifatanya nawe mu gihe cy’umubabaro, arakora hirya no hino kugira ngo ibintu bikorwe neza ndetse akomeze no kugushakira utuntu dutandukanye kugira ngo uve mu gihe cy’umubabaro wongere gusubira mu byishimo, rwose ngo ni ikimenyetso nyacyo cyerekana ko akwiyumvamo kandi ko ufite icyo uvuze mu buzima bwe.

10. Aguha impano zishamaje

Aha ngo si ngombwa ko  impano zishamaje ziba zihenze kugira ngo ubone ko agukunda ahubwo ngo uzasanga aguha wenda n’izo yikoreye, yavanye mu bukorikori bwe, akarabo aciye ahantu ku nzira se, agafoto kanditseho utugambo tw’urukundo n’ibindi ariko bifite icyo bisobanuye mu rukundo.

Ngira ngo nk’uko mwabibonye rero hari ibimenyetso byinshi bishobora kukwereka ko wowe n’umusore mukundana hari urukundo nyarwo kandi ko akwiyumvamo. Jya ukora uko ushoboye ugenzure ko ibi bimenyetso bihari bityo bibe byakwereka uko uhagaze ndetse n’agaciro ufite mu buzima bw’umusore muri kumwe mu rukundo.

 


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Menya niba koko agukunda cyangwa se ko ashaka ko mwinjirana mu rukundo


 

 

1. Kugushyira muri gahunda ze z’ejo hazaza. Uyu muhungu ahora yihatira gukora ibikorwa bibafitiye mwembi ejo hazaza akamaro. Niyo ntacyo murageraho, wumva mu nzozi ze harimo kuzabana na we ubuzima bwe bwose.


2. Kugusekera cyangwa kumwenyurana ibinezaneza igihe akubonye, Umuhungu ugukunda niyo yaba ababaye, iyo akubonye kubera ko uba uri umuntu w’agaciro imbere ye no mu buzima bwe, aba yumva agiye kugutura agahinda ke akaruhuka kuko aba yizeye ko umutwaro afite ugiye kuwumwakira. Ni kimwe n’iyo yishimye, ahora yumva ashaka kugusangiza ibyishimo bye bya buri munsi ndetse bya buri mwanya.


3. Kugucira bugufi yagukorera ikosa akagira ishyaka ryo kugusaba imbabazi vuba kandi aciye bugufi, n’igihe ari wowe kandi wamukoshereje, iyo umusabye imbabazi ubikuye ku mutima arakumva akaziguha kandi akakugira n’inama ku buryo wazajya wirinda amakosa.


4. Kuguha impano zisanzwe zidahanitse kandi n’igihe runaka kitateguwe, nta mpamvu aziguhereye, nta kintu kidasanzwe wabaye. Izi mpano si izihanitse kuko akantu kose uhawe n’uwo ukunda kandi nawe agukunda wumva ari impano.


5. Gukunda kukwitegereza. Umuhungu ugukunda uzasanga akunda kukureba, aguhozaho ijisho, akantu kose ukoze niyo waba uzi ko atakubonye uzisanga yakubonye kare kandi neza, niho nusitara gahoro cyane uzumva yakubwiye ngo komera, niwitsamura cyangwa ukajya kwitsamura bikanga azahita akubwira ngo urakire, nimuvugana utishimye utari wabimubwira uzumva ahise akubaza ngo umeze ute cyangwa ngo uravuga nk’utameze neza.


6. Kukwisanzuraho kugeza ubwo akubwira amateka y’ubuzima bwe atandukanye ndetse akihatira kukubaza amateka yawe yose, uzasanga ashaka kumenyana n’abo mu muryango wawe, amateka yawe ya kera. Ibyo uzamubwira waciyemo bibabaje uzajya wumva bimubabaje n’ubwo byashize azajya akwihanganisha kandi ubyumve ko abikuye ku mutima koko.


7. Kukwemera uko uri kose.Umuhungu wagukunze akagera n’igihe agusaba urukundo ni uko uba waramunyuze mu by’ukuri. Igihe rero muzamarana igihe kirekire mukundana agakomeza kukubwira ko umunyura, akwishimira kandi agakomeza kukubaha nk’uko byatangiye. Abakundana bemerana ingeso buri umwe afite iyo ntacyo zibangamiraho urukundo rwabo, ariko nabwo abakundana barafashanya mu buryo butandukanye harimo gutozanya imico myiza no kwigishanya kureka utugeso tumwe na tumwe tubangamira ubuzima bwa buri munsi bakatureka.

8. Kukugirira ishema. Umuhungu ugukunda aterwa ishema na we, niho uzabona igihe mugendana agufata akaboko, ari nk’umurinzi wawe. Iki ni kimwe mu bimenyetso by’ingenzi bikoreshwa igihe abakundana bari kugendana. Iyo umuhungu agukunda aba yumva yanabyereka buri wese ko mukundana, aba yumva nta banga ririmo ko mukundana.

9. Kukwifungurira. Umuhungu utagira icyo aguhisha ndetse n’amakosa ye. Yewe n’iyo yagukoreye amakosa wowe ntuhite uyabona we aragutanga akayakwibwirira kandi akayagusabira imbabazi.

10. Uritondere abahungu bafite akarimi karyoshye kandi gashyushye. Ntibyoroha kwirengagiza amagambo aryoheye amatwi ariko ayo magambo akenshi aba yuzuye uburyarya. Amagambo akenshi arabeshya niyo mpamvu ari byiza cyane kugendera ku bikorwa n’imyitwarire bigaragara. Hari abahungu batabarika bigarurira abakobwa bakoresheje utugambo turyoshye kandi mu mitima yabo bafite izindi nyungu bagendereye bashaka kugeraho zitandukaye n’urukundo rw’ukuri.